The Page Of Puns» giants http://pageofpuns.com The Pun Starts Here! He he he! Wed, 08 Feb 2012 09:52:51 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 The Thinker http://pageofpuns.com/shaggy-dog-puns/the-thinker http://pageofpuns.com/shaggy-dog-puns/the-thinker#comments Sat, 28 Jan 2012 00:01:18 +0000 The Pun Master http://pageofpuns.com/?p=290 One day a planet is discovered out Antares way whose sole inhabitant is an enormous humanoid, three miles high and made of granite. At first it is mistaken for an immense statue left by some vanished race of giants, for it squats motionless on a yellow plain, exhibiting no outward sign of life. It has legs, but it never rises to walk on them. It has a mouth, but never eats or speaks. It has what appears to be a perfectly functional brain, the size of a condominium, but the organ lies dormant, electrochemical activity at a standstill. Yet it lives. This puzzles the hell out of the scientists, who try everything they can think of to get some sign of life from the behemoth–in vain. It just squats, motionless and seemingly thoughtless, until one day a xenobiologist, frustrated beyond endurance, screams, “How could evolution give legs, mouth and brain to a creature that doesn’t use them?”

It happens that he’s the first one to ask a direct question in the thing’s presence. It rises with a thunderous rumble to its full height, scattering the clouds, thinks for a second, booms, “IT COULDN’T, ” and squats down again.

“My god,” exclaims the xenobiologist, “of course! It only stands to reason!

]]> http://pageofpuns.com/shaggy-dog-puns/the-thinker/feed 0 The Chair Tribe http://pageofpuns.com/shaggy-dog-puns/the-chair-tribe http://pageofpuns.com/shaggy-dog-puns/the-chair-tribe#comments Mon, 31 Oct 2011 22:46:34 +0000 The Pun Master http://pageofpuns.com/?p=250 There was a tribe in Africa which was very fierce and warring…they would battle all the tribes in the area, and they always won. As a victory trophy, they would take the throne of the chief of the defeated tribe and carry it home, chanting victory chants and singing the whole way. When they got home, they would put the throne in the attic of the grass hut. This went on for quite some time, and soon the throne collection grew, adding to the prestige of the tribe.

One day, they battled a tribe of farily large people, some might call them giants. They won, and they struggled to get the throne home…but the chanting and joyesness prevailed as usual. When they got home, they had the ritual of putting the throne in the attic of the grass hut, but the weight was too much. The ceiling collapsed, killing everyone on the tribe.

The moral: People who live in grass houses shouldn’t stow thrones.

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