Did you hear the one about the two boll weevils? They both grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much.
The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.
Did you hear about the guy who took a course at a college on making nativity scenes? it was a creche course.
I started using Windows, and now I’m all GUI!
Can an english major learn math? Cosecant!
Schrodinger’s cat: “Mu”.
Did you hear the one about the farmer who didn’t realize he was growing crops on a former nuclear test site?
Everyone who ate his produce came down with atomic ache.
Definition of a tachyon : a gluon that hasn’t dried yet.
If you’re not part of the solution, you must be part of the precipitate.
“You’re a proton”
“Hey! that’s a serious charge!”
When she told me I was average she was just being mean.